Partnership Talks With Vape Company JUUL Standing Still, Says Singer/Songwriter Jewel

Anchorage, AK — In the annals of vape, no hit wields more power than that of a JUUL. And, known for a hit or two herself, the singer/songwriter Jewel has taken notice. So much so, that up until recent talks came to a halt, the famed Alaskan songbird thought she might pen a theme song for the electronic cigarette maker. 

Already wealthy from her musical success and with millisecond of viral video fame to her name, Jewel was not only on the hunt for another money making opportunity, but a chance to breathe a more savory flavor of life into her stagnant career. Nowadays, the multi-talented performer is at her lowest point of cultural relevance since she was living in her Honda Civic in streets of San Diego.

Aside from the like-sounding names, it did make a lot of sense for the recording artist to seek sponsorship with the younger generation’s smoking apparatus of choice. The partnership would have been a natural alignment for an aging entertainer to reconnect with a new generation through their generation’s delicious (though toxic) vice. Plus, she just couldn’t get enough of that desert flavored vapor. 

But, much to the disappointment of Jewel herself, JUUL’s target audience of millennials never knew much about foolish games, standing still, or even about any of her iconic meanderings along various musical soundscapes. And, this was the true point at which the attempted partnership began to fall apart. 

Additionally, since e-cig maker has come under a recent and viscus cloud of scrutiny due to a plethora of PR faux pas, a pause was put any theme song coming from the great Northwest’s favorite songstress. Ever so conscious about saving souls, Jewel decided it was time to opt out of the whole deal she sought out in the first place. After her urges with execs from JUUL to drastically change policy fell on deaf ears, she felt like being and ambassador for the whole vape craze just wasn’t meant for her, or you for that matter.